Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The eye doctor saw me.... and, threw up his hands in wonder and frustration. Poor guy!

This is Doctor Calderone in his most primitive state of "I give up!"! And this is the story of my eye exam with/of Dr. Calderone telling me :
"This is going to sound like a cop-out, but, I'm bascially throwing up my hands and giving up! Your eyes are a mess and I am sending you back to the specialist to see what he thinks, and, btw.... how come you took so long to come back, it's been over five years!?"
To which I replied : "well, I've been saving up for a dog and cane, but now that I pretty much can't read at all, I thought I would let ya have a look again!"
You see (puns R Us!), I have several eye issues since the beginning of my time on the planet.

My right eye is near sighted and my left eye is far sighted. Sounds easy enough, however, I also have an extreme case of several words all strung together which bascially say I have double vision on top of this mess because of more important words, and it has been that way all my life and continues to get worse and baffle the docs who examine me!
It pretty much looks like this after my right eye gobbles up a prism that is set into the right lens of my glasses..... which is what has happened over the five years since my last exam and a thousand dollars worth of glasses !
I don't know who this guy is and maybe he looks like this all the time to everyone, but this is bascially how I see things without glasses when I am very tired ! Fun, huh? In fact, Dr. Calderone asked me if I could 'split' him and I told him that I couldn't exactly make two of him, but could blend him so that he had four eyes and the rest a blur...just like this! Gotta love Google Images !

So:
????
Nope ! Got a note to hand over to the specialist all written in factors and abbreviations.


Crazy thing is >>>>> Even after I go to the guy and he customizes my Rx with a stronger prism that my brain will gobble up in a few more years.... I CAN'T EVEN GET THE GLASSES ANYWAY! I mean, Jeez.... who can afford that stuff ?

I might start learning Braile !
Or keep saving for that dog and cane!

So, all in all, it was all good. I actually did well with the 'is this better?" drill. Only freaked out once!
I can't tell you just how much FUN it was to type this and put it all together with dilated pupils!
FAROUT!

1 comment:

Kerry Marie McG said...

We McGrath's really define the meaning of "the practice of medicine!"